The Insecurity Tag : 10 Things I'm Insecure About

I came across this tag on Instagram (Follow me HERE ) and I realised reading about the insecurities of other people really made me feel something not exactly because I could relate with their insecurities but because it warmed my heart and inspired me in ways I can't explain. This is why I decided to share a few of mine: both the ones I used to have and the ones I still have. The tag says ten and I hope I'm able to come up with that many.

In real life, I'm covering my eyes because you're about to read my never been told secrets. 

1. I used to be really insecure about my face in Secondary school because pimples ridden. I remember that when I was in SS1, it was at its peak and I used to talk to people especially seniors with my face down. I got tired of hearing "What happened to your face!?" every time someone was sending me to go fetch her water or whatever the errand happened to be.

2. I'm pretty insecure about not having any stereotype talents. Singing, dancing, acting, drawing and the likes. I'm not exaggerating when I say I used to think I was the only one God created like that. Really dealt with my self confidence for a long time. Those were the days when social media wasn't the hype but now that it is, it has made me see that there are other people like me who are making waves in their unconventional fields. I've now accepted that I'm still a creative despite the fact that I can't do all what is traditionally tagged as creative. I'm however not going to pretend that I don't sometimes wish I could sing well or dance or draw!

3. Even though I get told that I have nice dentition a lot, there's still something about it that I'm quite insecure about. I have extra tooth on both sides of my mouth that makes me not want to open my mouth too wide while laughing around people I'm not very free with. Funny thing about this is that I know they can't see it but I just keep being careful.

4. My mood swings. I'm insecure about them. How it can take me from 100-0 is annoying and I hate the fact that I sometimes can't control how it makes me relate with people when it comes on.

RELATED ON THE BLOG  : For Times When You Go From 100-0 And You Can't Explain It.

5. I know gone are the days when being smart was restricted to academics alone but I still feel really bad about not being a mathematical 'genius' cause I developed interest in it wayyy too late which makes me feel like a fraud when people tell me I'm smart if we're talking academics.

6. I'm insecure about my ability to totally overthink any thing possible. Exactly why I hate being idle cause when I am, my mind begins to wander and a random fact? I could be psychic (I don't mean the crazy crazy psychic powers Lol!) . So just imagine how much energy I have to use when bad thoughts pop up.

7. I know almost every lady can relate with this maybe not as serious as I do but I do feel really insecure about my 'abilities' as a lady when dysmenorrhea comes knocking and I'm all over the place. I've met people who have it worse but there's still this part of me that gets angry because I can't just pull myself together cause of some hormones.

8. I could be really secretive which is why an insecurity coat comes on whenever someone I know asks for my blog url or tells me they read my post. I know that's the essence of the whole thing, to get everything out of my head and have people read them but I can't help but have my heart beating faster while thinking "Oh no, this person is about to get into my head."

9. I tend to be really indecisive which is one crazy insecurity I have. It leads to a whole lot of other insecurities because when you're supposed to make a choice between two very simple options and you can't, you'd start to consider yourself dumb. That isn't cool.

10. Every other insecurity has been quite serious and though I'm not very sure this counts, I'd still put this one about me not being able to stand animals. Dogs especially, yes I said it! I'd share a quick anecdote to buttress this point.
 I was at a family friends' place and this huge dog was walked into the sitting room by a about 10 years old boy, I screamed and put my legs on the couch. No shame. Sad thing was that I already refused him my phone for games. Just know he used the dog as a bait guys and he eventually played the games. I was so ashamed of myself that day! Lol. How do you people do it? I can't even touch a dog comfortably. So the basic insecurity here is that I feel so not courageous when I remember this occurrence.

Whew. You probably read that under 5 minutes but just I actually used close to a week to come up with 10 insecurities. It's so hard really, at some point I thought I was in someone else's head cause why would writing about myself be so difficult? This is probably because as humans we naturally put up a defence mechanism that shields our insecurities from coming to the surface when it's time to tell it all. It feels sort of weird that I have no physical insecurities on the list. I definitely have some physical attributes I might want to be different but I'm not insecure about any of them. I have too many psychological ones already.

I feel the need to talk about how I dealt with some of these insecurities and how I intend to deal with them but I won't because it's just about sharing and being vulnerable.

What are some of your insecurities? I shared 10 of mine! Share one as many as you can.
What insecurities do we have in common? There has to be at least one, kindly share with mee?

I always want to hear from you. Kindly leave me your thoughts. xxx